Okay, so you tried. You tried doing The Thing, whatever your thing is, just once. Like we talked about last week. You and I were going to pick that one, most important thing, and do it no matter what. No exceptions. Anyone can do anything once, right? Do it once, celebrate and use that good feeling to build momentum. So you did your thing, you celebrated, but it just didn’t feel right. Or maybe no matter how much you promised yourself, and with the best of intentions, you just couldn’t bring yourself to get started. Have you considered that maybe you just don’t want to?
It is so easy to get caught up in our society’s idea that we must be everything, all the things. Top-shelf employees who have side hustles. Working towards entrepreneurship (because of course we all want to work for ourselves. Forbes list, here we come). We must be always available for our friends and families. Maybe you have kids who have a busy calendar full of activities. The school always needs something from you. You must have a rigorous fitness routine. I think we’re all supposed to be meditating now, too. And don’t forget hobbies and self-care. Make sure you’re enjoying nutritious, home-cooked meals every night. That house better be spotless. Can’t forget to document it all across multiple social media channels.
Say it with me now: Fuck that noise. That’s all it is. Noise. It’s overwhelming and assumes a one-size fits all mentality. But you, wonderful soul, are unique. What about what YOU want? It’s your life after all. Maybe you are happy with your 9-5 and have no desire to climb the ladder. Your kids don’t do multiple activities and won’t eat vegetables? I think that’s awesome. I don’t particularly care for a rigorous fitness routine (aside from jiu jitsu) and my family doesn’t always eat nutritious meals. The laundry is generally behind. No one does it all, no matter what they or their social media channel(s) tell you. With so many to do items on the should-do list, how do we decide what is worthy of our most precious resource, our time?
Decide between what you’re interested in, and that to which you are committed. It does not make anyone a failure or lazy if they decide not to fill up all 24 hours with doing all the things. If you’re committed to something, it means you will get it done. It’s really important to you and you’d be sad not to do it. When something you’re committed to doesn’t get done, you know you had a good reason and you’re motivated to do better next time. If you’re interested, it might get done, might not. When the thing you’re interested in doesn’t get done, you wonder why you can’t do All The Things. Our friends Shame and Guilt start piping up in your head. I’m here to tell you to drop interested for committed.
For me, I am committed to a minimum of 4 jiu jitsu classes per week. If that means the kids eat fast food once a week to make it happen, so be it. It’s important to me. Maybe you skip one family dinner a week to make sure your favourite Tuesday night run gets done. Playing guitar every day and starting a new running program? Much as I want it, I admit I’m solely interested, not really committed. If those things don’t get done, well that’s okay, maybe another time. It can be hard to accept, but not everything can be a priority all the time. So what are you committing to? What are you admitting to being only interested in? Drop me a line in the comments below, on social media (yes I have multiple channels, don’t judge me), or by email-I want to know!